Today, I finally got a chance to spend some time with my God-daughter. She is in the second grade and is the smartest second grader I’ve ever talked with. Her vocabulary is well-rounded and you can tell the adults in her life don’t “play it down” one bit. She loves to read and does a great job reading aloud from chapter books already. She loves her teacher and talks about her class activities with excitement and vigor. She loves her family and takes pride in being the sister.
We were eating pizza, one of her favorites, when my husband took a picture of us ordering and….Imani can order for herself. “Pepperoni pizza with stuffed crust” she said. I looked at photo of us on his phone and stated, “I look old today!” Imani looked into my face ,but didn’t say anything.
Then after eating we stopped by a Super Walmart to shop a little; any second grader can use a few rings to accessorize her wardrobe. My husband printed out two of the photos, one for us at our home, and one for Imani at her home. I again said, “Umph, I look old today!”
While washing our hands in the bathroom, I glanced in the mirror (and must have looked old) and ran my fingers through my hair, pressed my lips together to smooth out the lipstick lined in my lips, and lifted my eyebrows attempting to lift the lines burrowed in my forehead. I heard Imani say innocently, “You need a make-over.”
Well, yes I do! Out of the mouth of babes! Sometimes it takes someone’s innocent statement to stir us to change. I think I do. I haven’t had a manicure or pedicure in months. My hair seems to be lifeless and I need to invest in a different shampoo and conditioner. My face badly needs a deep facial cleansing and my eyebrows a shaping. My coat was bought probably ten years ago and although not really out of style, not in either.
And as Imani states, “maybe you should use some eye shadow and buy a pair of gold high heels…they will help to make you look younger!” Oh, the smile and heartfelt concern on the face of my youngest family member spoke volumes. She didn’t accuse me of not trying, or shame me for letting myself go, or even act like she hadn’t noticed that I was “looking old”, she just offered me good honest suggestions on making myself look younger.
Well, it’s in my court then; I plan on taking action. I may just go with a pair of cute moderate heels and a little tint on the eyelids…. but tips I plan on using. Besides that, I will attempt to plan time for myself in improving the things I saw and verbalized. I find often that until we acknowledge our issues, we can’t get help. After acknowledging our needs or conditions, we can act. So therefore, we can either find resources or hear the ones around us. I find with people experiencing grief that they acknowledge their issues, verbalizing their loss and feelings, and identify the needs to focus on. It only takes an understanding person to listen and offer some ideas, support, or suggestions. Not allowing excuses or reasoning, not blaming or causing guilt, but being honest and upfront in offering their best!
So if you find yourself in that position; listen to your comments about yourself. “How are you doing?” so many ask. Be honest and listen! Find sources of help or just listen to yourself. Lonely? Get involved with a support group, church organization, or volunteer helping others. Tired? Make sure your routine is healthy. Eat healthy, get proper rest, and exercise. Depressed? See a doctor, try journaling, acknowledge positive things in life. Angry? Forgive your loved one for leaving you. Out of the mouth of babes!
We were eating pizza, one of her favorites, when my husband took a picture of us ordering and….Imani can order for herself. “Pepperoni pizza with stuffed crust” she said. I looked at photo of us on his phone and stated, “I look old today!” Imani looked into my face ,but didn’t say anything.
Then after eating we stopped by a Super Walmart to shop a little; any second grader can use a few rings to accessorize her wardrobe. My husband printed out two of the photos, one for us at our home, and one for Imani at her home. I again said, “Umph, I look old today!”
While washing our hands in the bathroom, I glanced in the mirror (and must have looked old) and ran my fingers through my hair, pressed my lips together to smooth out the lipstick lined in my lips, and lifted my eyebrows attempting to lift the lines burrowed in my forehead. I heard Imani say innocently, “You need a make-over.”
Well, yes I do! Out of the mouth of babes! Sometimes it takes someone’s innocent statement to stir us to change. I think I do. I haven’t had a manicure or pedicure in months. My hair seems to be lifeless and I need to invest in a different shampoo and conditioner. My face badly needs a deep facial cleansing and my eyebrows a shaping. My coat was bought probably ten years ago and although not really out of style, not in either.
And as Imani states, “maybe you should use some eye shadow and buy a pair of gold high heels…they will help to make you look younger!” Oh, the smile and heartfelt concern on the face of my youngest family member spoke volumes. She didn’t accuse me of not trying, or shame me for letting myself go, or even act like she hadn’t noticed that I was “looking old”, she just offered me good honest suggestions on making myself look younger.
Well, it’s in my court then; I plan on taking action. I may just go with a pair of cute moderate heels and a little tint on the eyelids…. but tips I plan on using. Besides that, I will attempt to plan time for myself in improving the things I saw and verbalized. I find often that until we acknowledge our issues, we can’t get help. After acknowledging our needs or conditions, we can act. So therefore, we can either find resources or hear the ones around us. I find with people experiencing grief that they acknowledge their issues, verbalizing their loss and feelings, and identify the needs to focus on. It only takes an understanding person to listen and offer some ideas, support, or suggestions. Not allowing excuses or reasoning, not blaming or causing guilt, but being honest and upfront in offering their best!
So if you find yourself in that position; listen to your comments about yourself. “How are you doing?” so many ask. Be honest and listen! Find sources of help or just listen to yourself. Lonely? Get involved with a support group, church organization, or volunteer helping others. Tired? Make sure your routine is healthy. Eat healthy, get proper rest, and exercise. Depressed? See a doctor, try journaling, acknowledge positive things in life. Angry? Forgive your loved one for leaving you. Out of the mouth of babes!
This made me smile, laugh and tear up a little. I wish you could see the "Joy" that others see. I think you look amazing :) You're always one of my very favorite people. Pamper yourself and feel wonderful...but know that your true inner beauty comes from all the ways you love and take care of others. (and the next time you look in the mirror, remember how Ryan said how young you looked!)
ReplyDelete